November 2021

     What is grief??? Grief is cited as “deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone’s death.” Grief is something that is dealt with by many different people in many different ways. There is no right way or wrong way to deal with grief. The hardest part of my journey was to keep my faith and believe in God’s plan for my dad and myself.

     January 9, 2021 was the day that my life changed forever. My dad, Giorgio Scala died from Covid 19. It was the most devastating news that a daughter could get. My dad was the strongest, hardest-working, and most generous man in my life. I saw him almost every day, vacationed with him, spent every holiday with him, and worked for him for over 30 years. I learned so much from him.

     His death was so unexpected that there was no time to prepare. The timeframe from him testing positive for Covid to his death was brief. There were so many Covid protocols that visiting him in the hospital was extremely limited and restricted. Our family was stuck on this roller coaster ride for weeks when he was in the hospital. It started with the doctor telling him to go the hospital right away due to his low oxygen level and that he would be back home in three days. How exciting, my dad would be home for Christmas!!! This was not the case at all; he was put on a ventilator Christmas morning and that is how the story played out. He died after 30 days with this terrible illness.

     I appreciated all of the love and support from family, friends, and our St. Catherine of Siena parish. It is truly a rough journey to take and there is no easy way to get through it. Every day has been a challenge for my family and myself. I felt like I was drowning with new responsibilities. I made a promise to my dad that I would take care of my mom and that I would not let him down. I had much more on my plate than I’ve ever had before and didn’t know how I was going to get through it. I prayed and continue to pray for his guidance and support during this difficult time. I do believe that my faith is helping me deal with my everyday struggles.

      In the spring, mom and I were invited to join St. Catherine’s grief support group. I was not sure what to expect or what I could truly get out of it. I went mostly to support my mom and another friend who lost her mom two weeks after my dad. I admit that this grief support group saved me! In the first few sessions, I could barely speak, I just cried and cried and could not talk about my loss. Every person in our grief support group had a story about a loss that had changed them forever. Some had a loss that happened weeks ago, some months ago and some years. It was a definite eye opener to hear and see how people were dealing with their loss. Grief impacts people differently and people deal with it differently. I learned that it takes time and no one can put a time limit on your grieving process. There was an incredible bond that was formed among our group. These people are some of the most honest and loving people that I have ever met. The directors are here for you and want to see your happiness. I encourage anyone who needs support to reach out to our church and our grief support ministry.

     The grief support group has helped so many of us. I think everyone can say that they got something from this group. I have learned that what you put into the session is most rewarding after the session. I am learning how to move on and get to the next day. Grief support is a group that does not mind hearing your story over and over again. They are your support and are there for you 24/7. By joining this group, you will get the tools to help you with your loss and for you to come to the realization that you are not alone. There are two sessions that St. Catherine offers, a spring session and a fall session. Many people continue these sessions until they feel that they are ready to move on. Grief support is a great way to start your journey after a loss.

     I feel blessed to have met the people in my group. We are here for each other and support each other. You may form a bond with other members in a grief support group who are dealing with same loss you are. Our group continues to meet outside of these meetings. There is a reason that we are still here. God is not finished with us; we still have work to do. Don’t give up, because life is precious. We don’t know when our last day on earth is, but we do know that God has a plan for each one of us.

     I love and miss you Dad! You are my rock and you will never be forgotten.

You can learn more about the SCS Grief Support Group at https://scschurch.com/family.